STAND BY ME: Chapter 14
Chapter 14
LOVE HAS TEETH
It takes about twenty minutes before Chris climbs up the bank and sits beside us. The clouds begin to break, and the sun comes through. Chris is covered in mud. “You’re right, Gordie,” he says. “We should leave him here. He doesn’t belong to anyone.” I nod.
We sit in silence for a few minutes. Then I have a thought. What if the the boys call the police? I go back down the bank and start searching in the wet grass and water with my hands. “What are you doing?” Teddy asks as he comes over. “To your left,” Chris says, pointing.
I look carefully and soon find the bullet cartridges. They shine in the sunlight. I give them to Chris. He nods and puts them in his pocket.
“Now we go,” Chris says. “No!” Teddy cries. “I want to take him!” “Listen,” Chris says. “If we take him, we could get into real trouble. Gordie’s right. Those guys can tell any story they want if they call the police. What if they say we killed him?” Teddy says nothing.
“We walk fast back to the bridge,” Chris continues. “Then we leave the tracks and go into town another way. If anyone asks, we say we were camping at Brickyard Hill and got lost.” “Milo Pressman knows that’s not true,” I say. “Then we say he scared us,” Chris answers. “That’s why we changed direction.” I nod. We all stand up, ready to leave. The rain is gone, and the sun is warm again.
We all turn at the same time and look back. Ray Brower is lying there, alone again. We turned him over earlier, so now he looks like he is just resting in the sun. But then you see the blood on his face. You see the swollen body. You see the flies landing on him. You remember the smell. He is a boy our age. And he is dead. “OK,” Chris says. “Let’s go.”
We walk back the way we came. No one speaks. We reach Castle Rock a little after five in the morning. We walk all night. Our feet hurt, and we are starving. But no one complains. We cross the bridge safely. We pass through the dump. Milo Pressman is not there, and Chopper does not seem so frightening now.
Finally, we reach town. We stand in front of our tree house. We look at it instead of looking at each other. “I’ll see you at school,” Teddy says. “I’m going to sleep until then.” “Me too,” Vern says. “But Billy is going to beat me up.”
“So what?” Chris says. “Eyeball will beat the shit out of me. Ace will get Gordie, and someone will get Teddy. We all have someone waiting for us. But we did it.” “That’s right,” Vern says, but he still sounds unsure. Teddy and Vern leave.
I wait for a moment. Then Chris says, “I’ll walk with you.” “OK,” I say. We walk together in silence. The town is quiet in the early morning light. For a moment, everything feels peaceful. I almost expect to see my deer. Then Chris speaks.
“Vern and Teddy will tell people,” he says. “Yeah,” I say. “But not right away. Maybe not for years.” He looks at me. “At first, they won’t know what to say,” I explain. “Then it will feel like a dream. Later, they will feel embarrassed to talk about it. And after a while, I know it sounds crazy, they might almost forget it ever happened." Chris nods slowly. “You understand people,” he says.
We stop at the corner of my street. I want to say something more, but I don’t know how. “Shake hands, man,” Chris says, sounding tired. We shake hands. “See you,” he says. “Not if I see you first,” I answer. He laughs and walks away, like nothing is wrong. Like he is not returning to an abusive father and a town that does not trust him.
I watch him go. Even if I knew the right words, I don’t think I could say them. Talking about feelings sometimes destroys the effects of love. Some feelings are too strong. Love is not soft, like the poets say. Love has teeth that bite. And those wounds never close. It hurts. And the hurt stays.
When I get home, the kitchen is empty. I take off my clothes and wash myself. I wash again and again, until my skin hurts. Then I make a big breakfast and start to eat. My mother comes into the kitchen. “Gordon, where have you been?” she asks. “Camping,” I say.
“We stayed near Vern’s field, then went to Brickyard Hill. His mother said she was going to tell you.” “She probably told your father,” she says quietly. She stands for a moment. “I miss Dennis most in the mornings,” she says. “I always look in his room. It’s always empty.”
“That’s terrible,” I say. “He always slept with the curtains open…” she says, then stops. “Gordon? Did you say something?” “Nothing important, Mom.”
